It Was Einstein After All!

(Warning: Contains Satire & Reality-Driven Time  Travel)

Is My World Really That Different Than Yours?

Really, though, it's probably not much different from your world. Although your world had sustained a different beginning than mine, I'm willing to bet that my world will probably end the same way as yours. In my time, I had tried to keep to my philosophy of never letting our world's collide. It could result in disaster. I've seen it happen before and it's not pretty.

My world may be in a different orbit than yours but pretty much, the same laws of physics applies to my world as it does yours. You may remember Newton as much as I remember Euclid. And Albert Einstein.What about him? Yes, he was a visionary. No, he wasn't God. Nor were the Beatles. Talented, yes. Did they move the masses in ways not done before? Yes and no. Did you ever move masses. I did. Me and the crew. We put the church atop the flat bed and drove it to the other side of town where it looks real pretty with the big blue mountain as a backdrop. Driven by Inspiration

The Big Bang. Ask Stephen Hawkins about that one. This man, too, a visionary. Not so much the future but he has a good eye for the past. Influenced by Einstein, pressed into service by Inspiration.

Thomas Edison, he was another one. What did he say? He said, "Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety nine percent perspiration." I sent him a case of Right Guard. Good job, Eddie!

***

Oh, If memory serves me right, it was sometime after the war when our front porch became refuge for a few of society's outcasts--members of the down-trodden and misguided; it was place where we'd convene on a hot summer night, discuss not the misfortune that fell upon us in a destined way but of the possibilities.

Sure, we may have smoked some hemp, downed a few jugs of wine and on some of the crazier nights, when ghouls went to bed with saints, we'd pop tabs of acid, just to see what the universe was really supposed to look like.

We were the children of tomorrow, unprivileged yet proud, impoverished but determined. Mike, with his long straight hair and moustache hovering above his carefully cultivated beard, resembled Jesus, especially when we dallied down the street to the Saint Peters church and he jumped on the pedestal in front of the real Jesus. Silhouetted in floodlight, we begged his forgiveness and tossed him another joint to fire up. Oh, and his little brother Jack, a throwback from the days when a boy would take his pole down to the crick and pray to Lord Jesus, that he'd catch something other than crabs . . .

***

As far as claiming myself a genius, I didn't... it was actually Albert Einstein who did. You see, we were sitting at a cafe on the River Thames, discussing extremely important issues -- those which are of paramount significance to the high-falutin, paparazzi-driven acolytes of mammary implants and the latest brand of lip gloss(talk about lip service).

 After guzzling a few buckets of espresso and munching on salvers of Crumpets we delved into the rhetorical side of existentialism and other ethereal isms concerning the plight of our genus, when I just about floored Albert with one of my  observations. The way he looked, it seemed as though he just stuck his fingers in an electrical socket... He got up so quick he reminded me of the Energizer Bunny sporting a reinvigorated libido... he ran over to his Volkswagen car to retrieve his legal pad. He began scribbling furiously all types of funny looking equations while mumbling, this kid's a genius and just then, the waiter came over and plopped the check down upon the table, breaking Ol' Einey's train of thought.